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| 09:54pm 24/11/2006 |
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mood:  contemplative music: Some HAL song
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Well, T-Day has come and gone, but not the full vacation break, so I guess there's still time for my current feelings about it to turn around.
But even after getting so involved with the holiday that I stayed up last night to plan, and stood on my feet for 7 straight hours today to actually cook, an after-T-Day feast, I still feel relatively unaffected. Just kind of like I did it and for no special reason in particular. And I know it's probably all about all that's gone down in my life recently, and how it directly affected this holiday. And it's probably about some crap that continued into this weekend. And maybe my general blase and noncommital emotional state lately.
But it strikes me as kind of strange that I could go through all that effort and not even feel for myself that anything was accomplished by it. I mean, I guess it may have been a little apparent that I didn't really enjoy or revel in it, since I fell asleep right after all the eating was done. I didn't socialize at all, really, even though we had guests. And ones that I've known for a while. I really did put a lot of effort into this meal. Possibly more than any other meal I've tackled alone. So why did it feel like just another meal in the end?
Maybe I'm being too critical of it, but it simply strikes me as odd to feel this way afterwards.
Yeah, I think I'll reiterate from an earlier sentiment: I need a break from my life. |
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| Blech |
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| 07:11pm 08/11/2006 |
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mood:  Fed Up music: Ayumi Hamasaki- To Be (Eurobeat Mix)
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I need a break from my fucking life. |
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| 06:22pm 09/10/2006 |
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mood: moody
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Tomorrow is the beginning of the end.
Life can never be the same going forward.
I don't think I'll ever accept what's happened. Nor will I ever be able to sympathize with why.
All I can do is keep my anger and dissapointment in check.
And provide sound counsel and a good example as long as it's not too late. |
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| On being sick |
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| 11:07am 07/10/2006 |
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mood:  rejuvenated music: Attack All Around- Yume No Kakera
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Well, since I've been sick this past week with what has now been shown to be strep (apparently the 3rd case on UCI campus so far and it's only the 2nd week of class), I thought I might take a few moments and write down some observations from my experiences. Really, they're just a bunch of random thoughts from a mind recovering from a 100 + temperature these past few days, so they may all be insane =P.
1) Being stuck sick in your room makes you the most restless person in the world.
2) Sometimes you shouldn't give the benefit of the doubt to the doctor/nurse. Medical test results can be wrong and conflict. Just call them out on it when you think they're wrong; it could save you a day of healing.
3) DON'T walk across the entire fucking campus with a 100.3 temperature. Not only is it hard as crap, it's also long as shit since you don't have energy to walk fast at all. And if you don't pass out on the way (which you will really want to do), you'll do so immediately when the trip's done.
4) Penicillin is still a miracle worker.
5) On soups: Why do they always tell you to eat chicken noodle? Of the 4 soups I got at TJ's, it has the least vitamins. Tomato-based soups, on the other hand, rock the vitos. Also, don't eat pho. DO eat Kimchi Ji Gae. SERIOUSLY. I felt so much better after that. Ask Rocky, Kimchi is a miracle food.
6) Hot showers/baths don't really help. At all. Except for when you still have body aches.
7) Smoothies and such help, but not for long.
8) Soup and sandwich meals get old REAL fast.
9) You get surprisingly tired after walking just a handful of city blocks even when you're pretty well into recovery.
10) Apprarently, breaking a fever in your sleep no longer means you're done with fevers. This is the first time I was ever sick and sweat out a fever in my sleep twice.
11) You snore real loudly and strangely when you have slimy bacteria growing all up in your throat.
12) Theraflu makes it easier to fall asleep. And start the day.
13) When doing the tea+lemon+honey thing, don't use green tea. It just ruins it. And it's therefore a shame. |
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| 12:14pm 17/09/2006 |
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mood:  meh music: Ayumi Hamasaki- End of the World -Laugh & Peace Mix-
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Here's some pics from a couple weeks ago that I forgot to post last weekend.
( More Playin' Around ) |
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| More Pics |
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| 12:03pm 04/09/2006 |
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mood:  accomplished music: None
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Some new ones from this morning. Yes, Chris, they're "wasted" again on normal shrubs and bugs found around my apartment. Anyway, I've picked a few to post here and if you wanna check out the rest, the url is webfiles.uci.edu/asmartin/www/pics2.
( I love macro ) |
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| New dSLR |
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| 06:24pm 02/09/2006 |
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mood: calm music: Misia- Koi Suru Kisestsu
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So I just got a new digital SLR for my birthday present from my parents. I got the Pentax *ist DL since I'll be able to use my old lenses from my 35mm Pentax P30t. Now I just need to convince my parents to ship them. Anyway, behind the cut are some pics I took today while I was fooling around with it and getting used to it.
( Pics with the cool new cam ) |
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| ::sigh:: |
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| 10:49pm 26/05/2006 |
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mood:  Attack of the EMO music: None
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I'm really starting to feel that I live my life in isolation and too much solitude. And it's starting to get me really depressed. I can't seem to make friends as easily here as I did back East (Fl or Ga), and I don't know why.
Don't mind me, I'm just feeling emo tonight. |
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| Back to old songs |
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| 11:07pm 11/05/2006 |
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music: Shakira- Estoy Aqui
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Shakira- Estoy Aqui (translated by yours truly, with a tiny bit o' help from good ol' google, and yes, I did take a few liberties)
I already know that all that was won't be coming back.
Time has left it behind.
I know all that all that happened to us won't be returning.
It won't ever happen again.
1,000 years can't get me to erase you and forget.
And now I'm here,
Wanting to change
The fields in the city,
Mixing the the heavens and the sea.
I know that I let you get away,
I know that I lost you,
Nothing ever could be fair.
1,000 years can get you to see that you can forgive.
I am here wanting you
Drowning myself
In pictures and notebooks
In objects and memories
That I can't understand
I'm driving myself crazy
Changing myself
A foot for my face
The night for the day
And there's nothing I can do about it.
The cards that I wrote
And never sent
You don't want to here of me
I can't understand
The fool that I was
It's a question of time and faith
1,000 years with 1,000 more
are enough to love
If you still think anything of me
You know that I follow, waiting for you. |
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